Thirteen down…….. This Too Shall Pass ………. Stay AWAY from the Orange!

 “This Too Shall Pass” - this has become my mantra over the last couple of weeks. Perhaps a T-shirt bearing this meme emblazoned on the front?

Yup. For the first time since my diagnosis of cancer in 2018, I haven’t felt well on some days. 

I’m 13 down, and after today’s treatment I’ll be half way through the five week generalised pelvic radiation which has been designed for me. Then I’ll only have ten of the specific blasting sessions left. (Please recognise that this description is my own personal use of words….. not the official terminology at all!) 

The dreaded diarrhoea kicked in the first weekend after I’d had four treatments. It came out of the blue, and was mean….really mean. 

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💩 If you’re squeamish about discussing poo, stop right here 💩 

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So, that first weekend - as I said, it came out of the blue.

About three hours after eating an orange, of all things. 

I had been feeling quite parched, and there was this lovely juicy orange smiling at me from the bottom of the fridge, calling to me……….. It was delicious. really refreshing. I had been wondering if the radiotherapy would leave me feeling dry mouthed - that could very well have been one of the numerous side effects that had been listed when I was consented. I can’t remember now. So an orange seemed like a good plan. At the time. 

Well. Three hours later when I ran to the loo the plan didn’t seem so great. I was on and off that toilet through the evening and half of the night. Probably until there was nothing left inside. 

The following day, I had stern words with myself. “Be careful what you eat, Cordwell. Box clever”

(Peter and I always use my original surname when speaking firmly to self…..sounds more military…as if someone else is ordering you to behave ……)

So. I had a nice piece of salmon, some rice and a fresh salad. BAD MOVE. 

Not too sure which aspect of the salad was to blame, or perhaps I had seasoned the rice in a manner that was unacceptable to my delicate colon? But what followed was another exhausting few hours of insane sprints towards the loo, accompanied with gut wrenching spasms too. 

Loperamide and Buscopan were becoming my best friends. I started doing a lot more intensive research with regard to radiotherapy and diet. Apparently, it’s best to avoid fibre (I’ve since discovered the difference between insoluble fibre and soluble fibre). Also wise to avoid seasoning and spices. Also cut out seeds and nuts. Whole meal flour is a no no. Brown rice too…….

What does that leave? 

What’s the best time to have some food when you have to deal with the London Travel network five days a week?

How much food can one tolerate in one sitting?

The general consensus of advice is that you should limit yourself to five small snacky-type meals a day, rather than three substantial meals. However, this doesn’t work for me - I was diagnosed with Diverticulosis when I was around 50, and I have a feeling that pelvic radiotherapy and diverticulosis do not make happy bedfellows. 

On my second week of treatment, I felt I was managing the situation better, and became slightly blasé. One morning I had a small bowl of porridge for breakfast before I took Minstrel out for her morning walk. BAD IDEA! I returned from the walk and was getting my bag together ready for setting off, when, out of the blue, I had to Olympic sprint to the loo (never before have I been more glad to have a toilet on every floor in the house). After two crippling ‘evacuation’ sessions, I felt that I might be safe to depart, and for the first time (EVER IN MY LIFE) I resorted to the wearing of an adult nappy. This was as much for psychological reassurance as anything else. I was SO anxious for the journey into town. And was messaging my daughter-in-law every step of the way …….

“Bus Stop ✔️ 

East Croydon ✔️ 

Clapham Junction ✔️ 

Marsden ✔️“

………and obviously the same in reverse.

Since then, I have decided that I am not going to eat anything at all until I return home from treatment. So far so good. 

I’ve also had one lovely day when my colleague Morwenna came with me to keep me company. This was on a day with two appointments spread over a few hours. So we visited the Chelsea Physic Garden, which is a 15-20 minute walk away from the hospital, down near the embankment. It’s lovely. And really well worth a visit. Fascinating to think that an apothecary started growing medicinal herbs there over 400 years ago. A few weeks ago, I wold never have dreamed that I could sit and watch someone eat lunch, and drink coffee and have nothing myself! Amazing what the fear of poohing yourself will do your willpower! 💪 

Looking at all those little garden plots, labelled medicinally “Anaesthesia” “Virology” “Immunology” “Infection” etc etc……. Makes one ponder and consider how far modern medicine has come since then? And how privileged are we to be able to access it for free?

When I was having a slightly gloomy moment last weekend, (after not being careful with my food intake, and having had a busy day of trampoline construction, pizza cooking and dog walking on the  Longleat estate, and diving in to the undergrowth for an emergency 💩……… let’s not dwell on that one) Peter made a comment out loud that I’d also been internally voicing…….. “just imagine going through something like this if you lived in Ukraine?”

 Yes. I have a great deal to be thankful for. 

Some days are going to be tough. Other days will be better. This too shall pass.

And…..it’s a brilliant weight loss programme! (But Slimming World might be safer???)

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